I am a terrible cook. Despite this, in my two years on-campus, I have witnessed and made a number of edible items, some of which were even good. Students like myself need all the help they can get food-wise — all starred(*) ingredients should be procurable from the Bon. I present a medley of such recipes from myself and several friends.
Julia Scott’s Microwave Pasta (20 min):
½ box of pasta
½ tablespoon butter*
Bon toppings* (cheese, red pepper flakes, etc.)
Fill a microwave-safe bowl with pasta, then add enough water to cover. Microwave for about 15 minutes, depending on pasta type. Strain, add butter, salt, garlic powder and toppings.
This recipe is as easy as it is questionable, but comes with a bonus of requiring essentially no cooking utensils. Please make sure the bowl is actually microwave safe.
Halcyon Orvendal’s “Beef” Cookies* (45 min):
⅞ cups butter (about 1.75 sticks), room temperature
1 cup + 2 tsp granulated sugar
2 cups flour
4 tbsp cocoa
1 tsp baking powder
1 tbsp vanilla sugar (2 tsp sugar and 1 tsp vanilla extract)
Trail Room nutmeg (optional)
Preheat oven to 400ºF. Mix butter and sugar until soft, then add all other ingredients except one egg. Combine into a dough. Separate the dough into six parts and roll into cylinders. Place on a baking sheet and flatten somewhat. Whisk egg with a fork and top cookies with egg wash. Bake for 12-15 minutes, and cut into about 2cm-wide diagonal slices after removal.
*Cookies are not actually beef, but resemble beef strips. While they do look a bit freaky, these are tasty cookies if you have the necessary baking supplies. Try adding some nutmeg to experiment.
Ian Cebula’s Garlic Bread (20 min):
6-8 slices of bread
½ cup butter
2 teaspoons minced garlic (2-3 cloves if you mince it yourself)
Set the oven to 425˚ F. While it is preheating, melt butter in the microwave, then add garlic and whatever other spices desired. Spread butter evenly on each slice of bread. Bake on a baking sheet for 8-10 minutes. You can use the broil option on the oven in the last couple minutes for toastier garlic bread.
Garlic bread is a delicious and relatively easy savory staple. This recipe should work just fine in any rickety Forest Hall oven you have access to, and the whole hall will smell great, so be ready to guard or share your meal.
Almond-Honey Balls (2 hours 20 min):
⅓ cup honey
½ cup almond butter
¼ cup coconut flakes
Stir together almond butter and honey in a bowl until mixed. Chill the bowl for 20 min. After chilling, roll into small balls, and then roll the balls in coconut flakes. Finally, chill for another 2 hours (if it is the common fridge, make sure to clearly label it and hope no one steals any).
This recipe comes from my time on an elimination diet when I could eat almost nothing except for nuts. It certainly makes a passable and easy (if somewhat expensive) gluten, dairy and sugar-free treat.
Bon “sponsored” Pan-Fried Rice (30 minutes):
2 cups cooked rice*
1 bell pepper*
⅔ cup thinly sliced carrots
1 tablespoon soy sauce*
2 teaspoons sesame oil (optional)
Oil/butter for frying*
Chop bell peppers and carrots. Beat eggs, mix in a pinch of salt, then scramble on medium heat. Set aside. Toss the bell peppers and carrots in with oil and salt and stir-fry for 2-3 minutes. Turn the heat to high, and add the scrambled eggs and rice. Toss a few times while drizzling with soy sauce and sesame oil, then serve.
Multiple friends have suggested fried rice as a means of repurposing Bon ingredients. This recipe is my attempt. Along with bell peppers and rice, I am told you can re-cook certain Bon meats (as a vegetarian, I feel unqualified to advise on this) or tofu. I recommend pilfering some green onions as a topping.
Nikita Starzhevskiy-Stowell’s Grenki (15 min):
6 slices stale bread
¼ cup milk
Oil/butter (for frying)*
Bon toppings* (butter, berries, etc.)
Beat the eggs into the milk until combined. Soak each slice of bread in the mixture until damp, then fry on medium heat. Serve with desired toppings.
Grenki is a Russian dish almost identical to French toast. This recipe is particularly simple, though, and is therefore powerful. Stale bread is better for Grenki, which is great since everyone who buys bread at LC will inevitably have stale bread eventually.
All images by Halcyon Orvendal
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