EVERY STUDENT knows that college life will lead to tears. We all cry, but for Lewis & Clark students it can be hard to find the perfect spot for a private breakdown. Worry no more with this handy guide to the best places to cry at LC, showcasing the most scenic locations in academic buildings, residence halls, around campus and even on the go!
Did you mess up that important paper? Did you run screaming from the classroom when it was your turn to give a presentation? Did you fail the exam that was inexplicably worth 75% of your final grade? That is okay. We’ve all been there. Take comfort with this little-known fact: during the construction of the academic buildings, architects who remembered the strife of their own college days planned for an extra closet in every building. These secret closets are equipped with pillows, blankets and copious boxes of tissues. To ward off nosy interlopers, they are usually labeled “storage” or “electrical: danger, keep out.” These are the perfect private spaces for your next emotional meltdown.
For those of you who call a residence hall your home, the creaking stairs and prison-esque mazes of the LC dorms are often your first choice when looking for the best places to have a good sob. Some great locations to try without leaving your room include shutting yourself in your own closet, curling up in the fetal position under your desk or bed or laying in the center of the floor with your limbs spread out as far as you can, weeping loudly. Bonus points if you force your roommate(s) to step around you.
Looking to get out of your room for a bit? Look no further than the nearest inconveniently placed lounge or kitchen. Sure it smells funny, but if you sit in the corner and cry facing the wall, you can be sure no one will bother you!
Are you at the Bon but you just cannot seem to keep the tears inside? You could go cry alone at one of the tables, but that is pretty overdone. No need to be cliché! Try out this simple hack instead: simply approach the nearest Bon student worker and let them know how you are feeling. If they take pity on you, they might let you go sit behind the counter and cry it out. If they turn you down, do not worry. Save the waterworks until you can squeeze into the cabinet beneath the juice dispenser for some real privacy.
Other spots that are perfect for crying: the trees, bushes and plants that adorn our beautiful campus. This is premium real estate if you need to hide in plain sight. Sitting in the dirt completely obscured by various foliage is the perfect spot to let it all out. Your clothes will be soaked from all of the rainwater dripping from the plants, so you can explain this and your tears away by telling your friends that you were caught in a downpour between classes.
On the Go
If you have the time for a cinematic cry, hop on the Pio and take one of the window seats toward the back. With a little practice, you will be able to master the art of staring out the window at an angle where no one else on board can see the tears, and you can gaze wistfully at Fred Meyer as you drive by. Pretend you are in a music video by playing the saddest music you can think of and ride the Pio on a full loop without ever getting off.
Above all else, remember that it is better to let it out than keep it in.